A Sirius Filk song
by Shandethe

(To be sung by Sirius Black to the tune of "One Jump" from Disney's "Aladdin")

SIRIUS:
Gotta keep
One jump ahead of dementors
One swing ahead of the Aurors
They all think I'm workin' for the Dark Lord
That's insanity!
One jump ahead of ol' Wormtail
That's all, and that's no joke
Believe it or not, I'm just an innocent bloke

DEMENTORS
Riffraff! Killer! Traitor! Take that!

SIRIUS
I think they see through my disguise

DEMENTORS
Let's play a game of Spin the Bottle, guys

SIRIUS
I can take a hint, gotta face the facts
You're my only friend, Buckbeak!

DEMENTORS
Eeek!

SIRIUS' FAN GIRLS
Oh, how sad our Siri's hit the bottom
He's become a one-man rise in crime
We're amazed the Dementors haven't caught him
SIRIUS
Gotta run to live, otherwise I'm dead meat
Tell you all about it when I get some time!
One run ahead of the Dementors
Who want to seal my everlasting doom
I better get the hell outta here soon!
One jump ahead of the Hit Wiz
One step ahead of the flock
Perhaps I'll take a stroll around the block

DEMENTORS
Halt there! Traitor! Horrid! Scandal!

SIRIUS *looks around, realizing he' surrounded*
Heh..please don't be so hasty

FAN GIRLS coming along to save him
Still we think he's rather tasty

SIRIUS
Gotta run to live, otherwise I'm dead meat
Or else we just might get along

DEMENTORS
Wrong!

SIRIUS
One jump ahead of those hood guys
(Traitor!)
Can't afford to sit there like a lump
(Killer!)
One sprint ahead of disaster
(Riffraff!)
They're quick, but I'm much faster
(Take that!)

*gets on Buckbeak, and starts to take off just as the Dementors close in*
SIRIUS
Here goes, oh, don't those guys look mad an'
Wish me happy landin'
All I gotta do is RUN!